The Oomph factor has turned 5,and the Unconditional factor.. 23
July 24, 2007Following is a small conversation of feelings among the same person.
But the roles played by her are differnet :
Main characters :her parents ,her lifepartner,and ofcourse her
Her dual roles:The parent’s daughter (A)
The man’s beloved (B)
THE STORY THAT WAS:Her five yrs have passed in bliss,she being lucky enough to have her first luv as the last one,romancing him,understanding him and the essence of the relationship,facing the upheavels and the side-effects;the pains and the pleasures.
At this stage she was confident that she can spend her whole lifetime with this guy.
THE STORY THAT IS:Time has come to display her secret publicly ,esp to those ppl whose relationship she had taken for granted : her parents .Her parents enlighten her a bout the grave realities and the society views of this intercaste alliance.As the story continues this is a conflict of the emotions displayed:
A:How can i forget the beautiful childhood,a responsible education and the character that my parents have imbibed in me?
B:I cannot forget the art of trusting ppl, the value of money and relationships and the lessons of survival in this bad bad world taught by him.
A:How can i give my life-givers a future of disgrace and an embarrasment before their kith and kin(well A’s parents are very orthodox)
B:How can i destroy the beautiful world that i have carved for him, the sweet family we had dreamt of and lots of love n fun.
A:Will my parents ever forgive me for going against their wishes??
B:Will he ever live happily after my injustice to him and can I face the future with a positive outlook??
A:I can sacrifice my 5 yrs for stability and certainity of future.
B:I cannot think of living a life full of regrets , lost love and a broken heart.
A:Things can very well change after marriage, afterall roses have thorns too
B:I can adjusted with the nuances of life defined by my partner but not with the change of partner altogether.
A:Ill have a whole family support in case of any marital woes, this comes with a guarentee
B:Ill will rely on me,my instincts and my partner, this comes with faith and trust.
Does she have to care for the unconditional love of her parents who have nurtured her for 23 years or the promises of the future which they had seen in this 5 years.
How can she trust the certainties on one side and predict the uncertainties on the other
And the battle goes on and on….
Well written. Here are my thoughts on this.
Time to move on. This whole world is one. Castes, religion and race don’t matter!! Love is the only true calling.
Parents are not always right!! If the older generations were always right, then modern world is a farce!!
Defy, dissent, bring a change!! Your parents will eventually accept it!! For God sake, can we Indians(especially in the urban areas) put an end here to the not so eternal conflict of self-found love visavis parental pressures??
At the end, if you still decide to go with the parental call, make sure that your offsprings gets its due right to select their own partner or they will anyways snatch it!!! But my idea is not to wait for that generation. Let our generation be the catalyst of change and break all barriers!!!
The love dillemma u suffering at the age of 18(correct me if am worng
), nothing but a hard feeling to explore the outside world next to you.Never you will find a fish rotting in a pool alone.Emotions betray and self sustains.Kill the scruplous emotions and think in a hard-thud manner.And here is the fig-leaf phrase – Life is not a bed of roses.
Will the guy have done the same if in your place.The perception of liebe soon evaporates when you face hard times.
DFA
My thought on this would be -
My parents have seen..suffered.. a lot in their life and they foresee from it that the same does not happen in their children’s life. For the same they sacrifice.
I have seen hunger and I learn t from it. It’s my commitment that I will never let my child sleep hungry. It is a big commitment as I don’t have a child now.
So, be a change you want to be. And change begins when YOU really SEE it not when someone says it..
Ups and Downs are the part and parcel of life. So be prepared for tough times too. Who knows when it plunges?
Ashutosh Narayan
@ashutosh: You are speaking of your parents case.
There are ups and down in both sides. Neither do all parents choices click nor do all self made choices flick.Atleast in the latter case u hold none responsible but u in case of problems, in the former u can do so towards ur parents.
SOrry to say, but your comments r totally out of sync and unrelated to my post